Personal credibility is to your credit

Human resources consultant and trainer Sandy Allgeier says if you don’t receive promotions and pay increases at work, have disrespectful children and have trouble forming lasting relationships, you may have a personal credibility problem.

“Personal credibility is truly a ‘magic bullet’ for success and happiness,” said Allgeier, author of The Personal Credibility Factor: How to Get It, Keep It and Get It Back. “Personal credibility is best understood by its absence. You may not say, ‘Wow, there’s a person with lots of credibility’, but if you display a lack of it, they will most definitely notice.”

Allgeier’s Credibility Busters

Failing to do what you’ll say you’ll do.
If you can’t follow through on your promises, don’t make them. Period.

Breaking appointments (or frequently rescheduling them).
If you don’t keep appointments, people stop trusting that you’ll keep your word about anything.

Constantly showing up late.
Plan ahead and show up early. Your credibility takes a hit when you’re normally late.

Speaking first, thinking second.
Rather than give a quick ‘yes’ or ‘no’ and then change your mind, give yourself time to think about decisions you need to make. Your ‘yes’ and ‘no’ should always mean ‘yes’ or ‘no’.

Telling little white lies that morph into Big Hairy Lies.
This happens often when you lie to spare someone’s feelings. Be honest about your schedule, preferences and feelings.

Trying to do everything, but ending up doing everything you do halfway.
Overextend yourself on a regular basis and you lose steam, build resentment and make mistakes. It’s far better not to commit.

Putting others down to pull yourself up.
When you congratulate someone on an achievement, don’t make negative comments to anyone privately. No one likes sour grapes.

Putting yourself down rather than learning from mistakes.
True humility is fine, but consistently raking yourself over the coals for past mistakes shows you haven’t learned from your mistakes and moved on.

Making too many excuses – even if they are legit.
You lose credibility when you offer the same excuses to the same people. Rather than focus on the excuse, focus on fixing the problem and avoiding it in the future.

Being a rigid rule enforcer rather than a flexible problem solver.
People trust problem solvers. They don’t trust people who insist on following rules at the expense of common sense.

Losing the balance between accomplishing tasks and maintaining constructive relationships.
“If you must choose between meeting your commitments and damaging your relationships with valuable people in your life, it’s probably better to break the commitment and keep the relationship,” Allgeier said.

Casting blame when you should be solving problems.
Casting blame creates relationship barriers. Instead, identify problems and ask for help in crafting solutions.

Coming across as “all knowing” when you’re really just thinking out loud.
If you have a tendency to think out loud, people who take time to mull things over may assume you’re changing your mind when a course of action takes a different direction. You lose credibility in this scenario, so always indicate when your thoughts are just that.

Exhibiting body language and vocal tone that doesn’t match your words.
Your credibility takes a hit when your body and tone are not in sync with your words. Work on staying genuinely in the moment.